Grief will always be a part of me. It is a part of every one of us, actually, but it is a topic that I can say, has spoken intimately to my soul. It is something I will often write about and discuss both personally and professionally. I studied grief in the past as a counselor because evidently it would be a topic brought up by clients. Over the years, I would hear about their hearts being torn to pieces from various types of losses, whether it be a pet, a grandparent, parent, spouse, friend, lover or child. While we may all relate to many of these losses it had dawned on me as to how much I've ignored the fact that we are still connected to our loved ones, in more ways than we may really ever know. That is, until now.
My intention to share this is to allow you to see that are so many signs around you as well, from your loved ones that have passed on. Take this photo of the twelve cents. In fact, I am writing about this 3 years to the day that I found these coins in my driveway. I didn't realize it until I checked the time stamp of the picture. This moment was etched in time for me. I recall that morning, almost 2 months after losing my husband, Alex. I was overcome by sadness thinking about him and sobbed in my living room before gathering myself to go outside to bring the garbage cans to the house. I walked outside and within seconds, I saw these coins in my path. How strategic they were placed in a triangle, which can have different meanings in spiritual sense. Weeks before I was made aware that our loved ones leave coins in our path to communicate to us that they are still very much with us. Seeing these coins reminded me in that moment that he is still here. There are still moments that I will feel sad about him no longer being here earth side, but as time continues to move forward, I have discovered so many signs from my beloved husband, and I am certain from other loved ones who have passed on as well. From feathers, cardinals, rainbows, and dragonflies, I have experienced so many signs and I am sure you have too. Unfortunately, heavy grief will create blinders or put us in a space where we are not present in the moment and so we may miss those signs as well. For others, it is harder to see or gets chocked up as coincidence. As time continues on, we may become more aware. Signs may not be instantaneous either and patience is key. After all, our loved ones are learning to live on the other side and are developing their abilities to communicate and they do love to communicate.
I have a few more signs to share aside from the traditional signs I've mentioned. I truly believe that the number 55 also serves as a message from Alex. I see it often, maybe on a mailbox, clock, mile marker, or license plate. When I do see it, it brings comfort to me and I immediately think of him. I consider it a nod, wink, kiss, or some endearing message from him. I will add that I had acknowledged this sign long before meeting my new boyfriend and may I mention that when I first met him, he had 55 as his car's license plate. Have you ever heard that our loved ones may put certain people in our paths? After my husband passed, we had a community festival hosted by his PBA and I got the nerve to get up to give a speech at the end. It was recorded by a friend, in which I posted to social media afterwards. Days after, it was constantly reposted on my feed. In fact, on his birthday it was posted about seven times within the hour. It became known to me that our loved ones enjoy technology and not just flickering our kitchen lights, although that happens too. I will finally share that this last sign I had wished I took a picture. While taking my kids to the trampoline park in the area, I pulled next to a blue car with out of state tags at a traffic light. The car's plate read AEX1370. Although his name was misspelled, it also included his badge number, 370. It sounds unbelievable and far fetched, I know. My kids witnessed it; however, I don't think they showed the enthusiasm I had.
Signs from our loved ones are reminders that they are among us each and every day. It is meant to bring comfort and I believe healing as well. I have learned to express gratitude as I receive these signs. After all, I am always looking for him and my other loved ones on the other side to send me more. -11/30/22 JH